Real Stories - May 2005

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Anna was not generally creative with games, but on one occasion surprised me. It was a Sunday afternoon and I was busy on the computer when she entered the room, surprisingly dressed in a business suit, and carrying a box that she handed me. In it were a roll of masking tape and a full alphabet set of large cursive letters, the kind that are posted above grammar school chalkboards. She had purchased them on ebay. "Its time for you to decorate the classroom" she quipped. She led me into the living room and had me paste the letters on the living room wall. She then had me strip as she got the cane from the bedroom closet. "Hands on your head" she ordered.

"Stupid, naughty boys like you need severe discipline. What letter is that?" she asked, using the cane to point toward the "A".

"It’s an A" I answered. She stepped aside, and landed the cane firmly on my bottom. "No, you moron, it's a capital A. And what letter is that?" she continued, pointing toward the "B".

Of course, my answer was wrong again (it was a cursive B). Nor was the small "m" small, it was lower case. The L was the letter after K. The W was two v's set next to one another. The S was the first word in spanking, which was what lazy students deserved. And so on, until all 52 upper and lower case letters had been incorrectly identified, and a very proud teacher led her well-disciplined student into the bedroom for some extracurricular activities of her own choosing.

Exhibitionism