Q&A Forum - August 2011 (best of Elise)

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I think some of this has to do with my body image. I have put on some weight over the last two or three years and none of my sexy leather outfits fit me any more. I should buy some new outfits but I keep telling myself that I am going to lose the weight and I will be able to fit back into my leather pants and my leather corset束腰 — a stiff garment that squeezes the waist and my leather one piece catsuit连体紧身衣 — a tight suit that covers the whole body.

We did your procedures about four years ago and they were great. I try to read your site each month and I just read your new book and I feel that old stirring within but I am having trouble motivating myself. We need this as my husband has slipped and he is not as obedient as he was when we were at the pinnacle of our femdom女性支配 — female domination marriage. Any suggestions?

A. The key to all of this is for you to have fun, enjoy life, and enjoy being a woman. View the D&S as an extension of your sex life and not merely a necessary task to train your husband. Sex is for the woman’s pleasure and your husband wants to please you. He wants to submit to you.

It will not always be smooth because he has insecurities and you have insecurities and D&S can force some of those hidden emotional issues to surface. But the good news is that once they surface, the D&S can also cause healing as long as all discipline is balanced with love and nurturing. It really is a beautiful lifestyle that can produce harmony.