Q&A Forum - June 2011 (Best of Elise)
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A woman cannot always discern whether her submissive顺从 — willing to obey has entered into subspace merely by looking at his facial expressions. Subspace is a condition of the mind, and it will not be the same for each person. It is a “space”, a mental compartment, or what I like to call the submissive顺从 — willing to obey zone. He very well may have gone into that “zone” the minute he saw you in your fetish恋物 — a strong sexual focus on one thing outfit. Or, perhaps he went into the “zone” during your session with him but you could not discern it. And it is possible that he never achieved subspace because you are both new to this and he was a little nervous or perhaps the D&S activities did not touch his submissive顺从 — willing to obey triggers to the place where he was transported to subspace.
It may take you months or years of FemDom女性支配 — female domination exploration with your husband before you discover those mental triggers. They may be deep within his psyche. That is why communication is important but keep in mind that he may not even know what those triggers are, or if he does know he may not be able to reliably communicate them to you. This lifestyle is all about exploration and experimentation. Have fun with it, keep at it, and eventually you will find those triggers.