Q&A Forum - June/July 2018

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That's why talking about these feelings with her is so difficult. I don't want her to feel like I want her to stop or make her feel bad about what she does. It has nothing to do with her. If I did ask her to stop, it would be completely unfair of me. So, asking my wife to stop seeing other men is not an option for me. And I don't think it's an option for her either. But I must admit I am unhappy right now with this arrangement.

Maybe I just need a cooling off period, maybe it's because we've doing it so long that I just need a break. Should I consider separating from my wife for a while? Just as a trial separation so that I can miss her for a while and recharge my batteries? I have considered this but when I do I feel really depressed because I fear she may not understand and I'd really hurt her or worse that, I'd loose her as a friend. If you have any comments on my situation, I'd love to hear from you.

A. No matter how uncomfortable it makes you feel, you need to discuss your feelings with your wife. I agree that to demand that she stop doing what brings her pleasure would be a selfish act on your part and would probably cause damage to your marriage. After all, cuckolding was your idea and not her idea. You have sown these seeds so you must be willing to live with the results and deal with the consequences of your actions.