Q&A Forum - September 2009 (The best of Elise series)

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Q. I'm a 24 year old graduate student. My husband is 37 and completely submissive顺从 — willing to obey to me. We've been married for two years. We had a very small but beautiful wedding, during which he promised to love, honor, and obey me, and to place my desires and goals above his. At the end, we were pronounced "Woman and husband."

Shortly after we became engaged, I had him legally change his last name to mine. It was easy for him because he's long been estranged from his family, but I would have required it nonetheless. As a dominant woman, it's important to me that my husband and future children have my name. I only wish more women my age felt this way.

When a woman's husband takes her name, it not only reinforces her rightful position as head of the family, it also makes sense on biological grounds: As we all know, during heterosexual intercourse a man leaves a part of his body, i.e. his sperm, with a woman. In order to procreate, he has to entrust his DNA to her; in a sense, he must relinquish his very essence to her. All men are born of women, and no man can reproduce unless some woman, somewhere, agrees explicitly or implicitly to give birth to his child. Obviously, the reverse is not true -- sperm is cheap.