Here's A Shock for Women

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As they all pursued their careers, society was changing. Marriage became more of a partnership. Women's work gained approval. Husbands began doing more chores around the house-9.5 hours in 1995, vs. 4.7 in 1965, according to John Robinson, a time-use expert at the University of Maryland. They also became more involved with their children; in a true sign of the times, Koala, the company that makes diaper-changing tables for public bathrooms, says its products are now as likely to be found in men's rooms as in ladies' rooms. The pay gap between men and women, though still considerable, was narrowing. According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, women in 2001 earned 76% as much as men, on average, vs. 63% in 1979. Many women began outearning their husbands. In a 1996 Catalyst survey of 461 executive women, 75% earned more than their husbands. Serendipity, timing, and earnings potential influenced the choices of these two-income couples far more than gender.

Giora Dublon was a Ph.D. physicist and a painter. Two years after the Dublons' daughter was born 19 years ago, Giora, 55, gave up physics to paint and spend time with her. "It was a question of who had the potential for greater financial compensation and who had greater interest in pursuing a career," says Dina, 49. "It was a question of making a choice that was not biased by gender about who is interested in doing what, and can we afford it."