Here's A Shock for Women

Screen 47 of 52

Of course, the current economic downturn is playing a role in men's increased involvement. Often, though, these dads say their time at home adds to the family stress level. As much as wives want their husbands to be involved, the role reversal can be difficult, forcing them to relinquish control of the home. Husbands, on the other hand, have to struggle against the ingrained expectation of being the bread winner. Espinosa, the Dell manager, thrived in his career in service operations there. But the 28-year-old often worked 60 hours a week. He was worried about the way he often left the house before his three kids even woke up. So when he got laid off in May, he decided to make the scariest decision of his career--putting it on the shelf for the summer. His wife went to work, for the first time in their marriage, at a local Internet company. "The stress between couples is tremendous," he says. "Two sets of our friends are separated right now, and the layoff has had a lot to do with it," Espinosa says. He's now looking for a new job.

Even if couples hash things out in their relationship, as the Espinosas have, trading places can bring on judgments from the outside world. Many stay-at-home dads complain about the conversational snubs and weird stares they get at playgrounds and school yards. More and more, though, these caregiver fathers are likely to become a more familiar sight.

Why Women Should Rule the World

FORTUNE

Monday, October 28, 2002

By Justin Fox