countessanne

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For women, I think they can learn, as I have learned, a different kind of self confidence, a different sense of their own power and how to use it, not just in erotic play, but in everyday life. For example, I think a woman can learn to be more decisive, more directive, to be able to state her case without giving ground or being obnoxiously aggressive.She can learn to stand firm.

C.A.: S/M is more than a sexual game, obviously. It is beneficial to a person's growth and to situations outside the bedroom. What would you say to the novice dominant to help her better understand what S/M really is?

KAT: Who knows what S/M "really" is.... I call S/M a game when it is dealt with as a game, such as at parties where people agree in ad vance on rules and preconditions of S/M behaviour for the evening. I tend to differ from this in that when I decide to play with someone-- i.e., have an experience with them--it comes to me as something that

I FEEL, not something that I THINK. I experience a sort of telepathic twinge that says to me: "There is good energy in this person. Energy that I can use to get off, to feel that rush."

S/M can be a form of living in that it contains physical action, psychological aspects, as well as spiritual, psychic, emotional factors. Straight sex usually does not involve all these ingredients of life the way S/M does.