countessanne

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KAT: I think it would be more productive for me to tell man what HE should be doing. There is a tricky part to this, in that the man most often physically bigger and consciously has physical power, even if he is con sciously trying to experience erotic submission. Lots of times he is the one calling shots. This does NOT enhance the woman's feelings of dominance and power. So a man must open himself to the idea of experiencing REAL SLAVERY and submission to the woman, meaning being willing to be submissive顺从 — willing to obey whenever SHE feels like being dominant, being willing to do what SHE wants to do. If not, if he retains power by telling her what he wants , he'll never experience the very thing he's wanting to experience: the erotic feelings of TRUE SUBMISSION. He's just GOT to let go of some power. That means he can't be the one who decides "when".

I think the woman should set this up from the very start. If a boyfriend or husband wants her to be dominant, she should realize that "dominant" means being in control. So she should take control right then and there by saying early on that it will have to be when

SHE wants to do it, and ONLY when she wants to do it. (Hopefully, there will be many times when they BOTH want to.

Otherwise, she is not in control. She will be fooling herself (or trying to) and will end up feeling like a game player who is doing it for him. But as for her being dominant? That's a joke!