Real Life Stories - Entries for October 2010 (Best of Elise)

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To say I was speechless is an understatement. I had never seen him so emotional, and fearful, and vulnerable. My first, and fortunately unspoken, thought was dismay at his lack of manliness (how wrong I was). I held and comforted him silently for a long time, then thanked him for his honesty and promised to try to understand.

We did not discuss the subject again for many uncomfortable weeks during which time I found your book. I must say that at first I found it mystifying, if not somewhat overpowering and threatening. But I stuck with it and also found parts that were most helpful and comforting. As I read, and reread, I began to find excitement that I could admit to. I began to think more and more of converting my new excitement to reality by assuming the dominant role for some parts of our marriage. The thought of my husband on his knees before me, having to obey and serve me seemed pathetic on one hand, but intoxicating on the other. After all, it would be a win-win since I knew he wanted it and I was beginning to think I might want it --if only I could have the confidence to do it. The excitement grew, and my view of our previous sex life began to look pathetically lacking.