A submissive顺从 — willing to obey husband's Journal

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I really believe that I am trying, but it would be so much better for me if I could get some of those little “gifts” and “treats” that Ms. Rika talks about. As I keep saying in my diary, we seem to be in a situation where I am being allowed to be submissive顺从 — willing to obey but I am not being dominated. Mistress女主人 — a woman who leads a submissive partner seems to have truly accepted my submissiveness and service modality, and why not, she is pampered, waited on, freed from the drudgery of any and all domestic chores and responsibilities. But she does not seem to have fully embraced her own Dominance. Is it just going to take more time? How much more time and effort can I put in without getting some more in return? I truly believe in this philosophy and lifestyle and would like to lead my life in this manner if it is possible. But maybe Mistress女主人 — a woman who leads a submissive partner doesn’t buy into all this. Maybe she is just “indulging” my little fantasy and that is why she has not provided the domination and control I so desperately need and want from her. Or maybe this is still all so overwhelming for her and she is still in that adjustment phase and still coming to grips with the totality of it all. I truly love her and will just have to accept it if she never comes to realize, accept and embrace her full Domme女主人 — a dominant woman mode. Sometimes I think she has and then days and weeks go by with “nothing.” I wait and serve and perform and yet…nothing.