Real Stories - September/October 2007

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I had unwisely given her absolute control and described that in her eyes, I was just an utterly worthless, insignificant victim of no consequence, strung up for her to perform on me as she imagined a sadistic and utterly heartless female top secret police official in a totalitarian state would. As I'd also ensured my total helplessness by the bondage捆绑 — being tied or restrained I'd chosen and by gagging myself so effectively that intelligible communication impossible, quite quickly, the whole scene had alarmingly got out of my control. My anxiety was mounting fast as I also realized too late, that quite naturally, she would consider any desperate struggles and any amount of muffled screams as a valid, indeed necessary part of the scenario I had demanded.

This wasn’t turning out at all as I’d planned it and now, what I’d never imagined could possibly happen, her activities were such that I really was starting to sweat with nervous apprehension and experience the mounting horrified anticipation a really genuine victim would in the same circumstances. Now I normally just play around quite moderately in sessions with professional Mistresses女主人 — a woman who leads a submissive partner. I’m masochistic in nature, but most certainly not into the really serious pain scene. Just a moderate amount mild torture early on and again towards the end of the session combined with a fairly realistic threat of future certain pain and suffering is quite sufficient for me.