Q&A Forum - March 2008 (The best of Elise)

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Q. Dear Ms Sutton, Thank you for a very informative and interesting web-site! I am considering purchasing your book, but am uneasy about a few issues I hope you can help me with.

I am a 35 year old man with dominant traits. In my relationship with my girlfriend I insist upon the right to spank her when I think she deserves it, and find this arrangement very satisfying. Personally I have lately been feeling how my submissive顺从 — willing to obey yearnings are surfacing, and would like to experiment with a temporary reversal of our roles in line with the beliefs expressed here on this site and in your book.

My questions are as follows:

1) You suggest one encourage one`s girlfriend to develop strength and dominance subtly, rather then jump out and demand to be dominated. While I see the logic of this I wonder what the consequences might be once I give her your book and ask her right out for a reversal of roles. Will she not think "I thought you did all these things for me - but in reality you just did it to make me into something I am not?"