Real Life Stories - Page 4

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She always loved putting my devotion to the test, which is good, in some ways it was what I wanted as well. But I had no safe word安全词 — a word that means stop, I wasn't allowed one. If I would try to shy away, I would always hear "If you loved me..." So I would do all the tests for her never expecting anything in return. She didn't even acknowledge what I would endure for her or completion of a task no matter how difficult it was. She would only "reward" me with more punishment and some times quite severe (She did this to make sure I never became complacent she would always tell me). I shouldn't even dare to expect acknowledgment I used to think but after awhile it just started to eat at me. I wanted something from her, anything, otherwise this whole relationship was just another pay-for-domination session - empty and ultimately meaningless, only I didn't have the luxury of having a safe word安全词 — a word that means stop. She hated that, she always said that I should always trust her, that she always knew best. She conditioned me to believe that she was always right and I was always wrong.